Rich - Keeper of the BBQ, still mystified by fire
We managed to get back ashore safely, dodging swans, angry fishermen and general abuse for people old and wearing pirate hats. The BBQ was already up and running and as hot as the sun, so I bunged some burgers on the grill and supped some more beer. Banter was good, some scary man was juggling balls, beer flowed, but no sign of the nurses blunty had a) promised and b) used as a tool to convince people to turn up!
Me, Hail to the Bus Driver !!
As the night wound down a little, blunty put some of his music on - to which Rich moaned asking for "some music with words" and "Blunty, you're music is shit, what is this w*nk" which then led to the Killers being played on the "HiFi" system. Blunty's mp3 player looked almost like his phone, just not as big, and probably with more battery life - oh, how the jokes still turn up.
The night slowed right down, so myself and Rich decided to be proactive. Armed with our pirate hats on our head, we booked a taxi to Leam, to drink ourselves daft(er) in the Well. We turned up and the taxi was there waiting for us, and we nearly scared the living daylights out of the bloke, and that had nowt to do with the pirate hats, then he saw the pirate hats and laughed. He then went on to tell us stories about
- Taxi driving is dangerous, he knew someone who had been killed in her taxi, and someone who cant walk anymore
- How he kicked the 256 shades of crap out of someone because the lads were taking the piss and called him fat
- How he doesnt like violence, but if we attempted to do a runner on the fare, he would hunt us down for the rest of our lives (not really)
Anyhoo, we got into the Well, and took the normal position at the bar and had a chin wag - only to attract strange and mad looking lads who kept asking questions about me owning a farm in cornwall ( I think it was me doing ARRRR pirate noises, rather than OOOH ARRRR farming noises ). Rich went to the toilet, only to be abused left right and centre by anyone, and came back a shell of a man, where as I was feeling argumentative, so decided to see what would happen if I went. I was greated with "Nice hat mate, looks good on you" and "Cut up him with a rusty razor" - although one bloke just looked at me in the bogs, never a good thing - believe me.
Anyhoo, after so much booze i could barely stand and talk, we decided to call it a night - only to bump into the lovely Rachel and the lovely Jess - where I probably didnt make any sense what so ever.
Currently in a hungover state and unable to do anything proactive - might go back to bed for a while