Friday, December 16, 2005

Last Christmas, I give you my ... Stella!

Lastnight was the work Christmas do - and was located in the restaurant in Jeffson's Gardens. I've been there a couple of times with the ex many years ago for lunch etc, so knew roughly what to expect - and knowing what happened last year at the party, its definately interesting. To mix it up a little more, they decided on a fancy dress party with the theme of nationalities - so friends being friends, we made an effort - well, some of it did anyhow!

Rich, so cunning, you could put a tail on him and call him a fox, suggested preparty beers down the jug and jester as a meeting place. So, one quick call later, Comrad Rich, Bellis and Big Bad Bob were on their way to pick me up. Rich made the effort by getting the biggest Russian coat imported from the eastern block, while Bellis and Bob, just couldnt be arsed - so turned up in jeans - and Bellis (old enough to be your father) turned up in his traditional "hip and street" gear.

We sup'd a pint in the Jug - well, Bellis had two in the space we had half of ours, then we were met my the lovely Helen, Lyrical Shamster Fursal and Captain Ireland - Johno. Helen was supposed to be turning up in some kind of kinky leather leiderhose - but "forgot them", Fursal was in some grass skirt type sham, and Johno's attempt involved a St Patrick's Day Guiness Hat.

We moved onto the glass house restaurant where it was complete chaos, and eventually after 25 mins of queuing at the bar, we got drinks - I opted for a bottle of wine to myself, while the others went for lager etc etc. The food service was pretty good, although when the waitress came around with starters and asked who was having what, I announced pretty loudly, that "I was a tart" - when she handed be some stilton and leek tart. Then, when the main meal came around, announcing to the same girl, that "I was a turkey" - you can see what the general jist of the convo for the rest of the night. By the way, yes, I did have the pudding for dessert.


Nomes, Rich and I decided to go wandering between starter and main meal - and had some camera fun in the plant/tree/green area of the restaurant - which just made me laugh even more everytime I thought about it. What made me laugh most of the night, was Rich's piss poor attempt at fake English/Russian accent, which came out Irish - so when he kept on announcing KGB (we had KGB Identification cards) - it sounded like someone from the IRA - then he tried Irish, which then came out Cornish.

Boo Hoo Hoo

This was the basic story of the night - take the piss, get pissed and take photos - then disco time - and they played mostly 80s music. Nomes asked for Gold by Spandau Ballet - which more or less got people up and dancing and having a laugh.

At that point alot of people got very drunk (me included) and this started random ranting of conversations.

Murder in a tree plantation.

Thankfully, the place wasnt just packed full of people from work - there were other parties - however they all turned up in tux, ball gowns and smart gear. So, the chances are, we've ruined their xmas - yay. After a mixture of guiness, rum, wine, beer and lager, the party was in full swing and a number of people went outside for a chat, chinwag, and cool down. One of the lads, Ket, decided to tell us a "short story" which after 25 mins, people were close to ending it all. Last orders was called, at some point, I dont really recall - so we got a quick one in - then made escape plans - there were three groups starting to develop - those who wanted to go home, those who wanted to go clubbing, and those (us) who wanted to go to the Well and stay after hours - which we did. We later found out that no one got into the club, as it was nearly 1am.

Reader's Comrad!

Thankfully to our magic key into the Well, we sat down, chatted, Big Bad Bob and I argued about random shit and Bellis just sat there grinning. There must have been a band there, as all the mic's were still stood there - and they left their sound system plugged in, playing music. I say this, as when "I dont like Monday's" came on, I decided to get up to the mic and mime the words - thinking most people had been kicked out - when, mid performance, I opened my eyes to find 2 people video'ing me with their mobiles and people clapping and cheering. Rich wanted a more somber attempt, so I threw everything I had into the last verse and chorus.

Me, start of the night, sober - not for long.

We got kicked out the Well, Bellis got his traditional Christmas Chips from the chippie, bob squeeked, I was unable to talk, and Rich just abused us all - all a bit like last year, funnily enough. They went their own directions and drank vodka til 4am - where I emailed a friend, entered a compo, stripped off all my uniform at the door and entered a coma.

Anyhow, the rest of the photos can be viewed here - I've still got a hangover and feel crud!

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