World of Warburton

Well, what has happened since the last time I blogged. Saturday marked John's magical mystical birthday beer related all day session - this year around the town of Warwick. Due to a home game on, and it being top of the table clashing, I decided to take in the game, and meet up with the rest of them later on. One of the lads from footie gave me a lift over to Warwick after the final whistle and found John, SuperGary, Jim and Debbie a little on the merry side, well Debbie was drinking halves of course. We moved from the Simple Simon (my first time in there) to the Greyhound (again, first time in there) and had a couple of games of pool - of which I was paired with Super Gary, and John paired with Jim. We took the compo to 1-1, before we decided to move on up to the Star and Garter.

We met MC and Laura up at the pub and we finished the pool compo - with myself and Gary winning - go us! Yay! We had loads of Speckled Hen, which I like LOADS, and we rolled back home, only for Super Gary to be recognised by the people who work in the BigCup - much to his delight.

Today, I managed to get a release date for my new job. IBM being IBM, if you transfer internally, your manager has to give you a set about of time to hand your work over to someone else. I had been offered the job, the day before I flew out to Bali, but because of vacation, other gumph and huge work loads, its only been decided today. 6th December, I'll be joining my new team. Part of me is excited, part of me is nervous as funk - after all, this is my first new job for over 8 years and yes, probably stuck in a rutt. Just in time for Christmas - of which, we had invites to the work xmas party for this year - with 70s/80s theme - we're unsure at the moment if its fancy dress - but hey, should be a larf

The Kooks

Lastnight was the long awaited Kooks gig up at the Carling Academy in Brum. Myself and Captain Rich were shamming around on ebay, as this was a complete sell out, and we managed to get tickets at an inflated price. Meanwhile, Rich then cross referenced the gig date, with a trip in Germany - Doing well. I try doing at least one big gig every year, and last year was Duran Duran at the NEC when we went with Nomes, Andy P, Rich and Shamster thats Bellis - this was big gig #1 of the year (Magic Numbers end of next month)

Naive - no!

I'd originally invited Geordie Mike in Rich's place, however, due to having to work late, Gigantor Pete was invited along and kindly drove up, as it was, quite litterally, raining cats and dogs. We grabbed Maccy D's just across the corner from the venue, and bumped into one of the lads from the Football, then made our way in the venue, with touts offering massive prices. Speaking of massive prices, £3.10 a pint of carling - but it was soo soo lovely. The place was covered with attractive women, mostly with chav boyfriends, and after our beer related purchases made ourway to the "dance floor" and heard the support acts which were pretty good too.

The Kooks came on and done the bulk of their album, and some "old B side" material, along with some new tracks they must be close to releasing. A good mixture of sing-a-long tracks and rock tracks made the line up as the temperature started to rise - and wearing two tshirts was probably not a wise act.

With Pete driving, we managed to get back onto the Motorway and back into Leam for around 11:30 ish, so ended up having a quick swifty in The Well, and god knows what state I looked like with two soaking wet tshirts on and hair all over the place. Anyhooo, a fantastic night out, just nice to get out of the goldfish bowl that is Leamington Spa and do something different.

Return of the Mac

With the kids swapping training sessions to Friday nights, I decided to return to my 6 til 7 slot for 5aside football. Yes, I've played football since my ankle broke way back when, however I think it was more of a mental thing to return to the same place, same time, same people and continue as life goes on. Yes, my chest was still sore from being elbowed in the ribs, and I think deep down, I shouldnt have really played, but just wanted to get out there. I decided, it would probably be wise just picking my fav position - ie, up front, and without the ability to track back - stay up front.

It did feel good, people were asking if I was ok, and to be honest, my leg was holding out pretty well, even when someone decided to hack my leg to shit to get the ball, I even had a couple of snap shots on goal, and touch wood, meaning my leg is back to full fitness. The chest really impacted my game, and I dont like to be known as the "one who goal hangs" and like to feel I put my effort in within midfield - today just didnt happen. I managed to set up 3 people with a goal and should have scored about 3 within 20 minutes myself - but its one of them days.

I managed to get in on goal and slot the ball between the keepers legs, just as I felt something twang in my muscle. I did warm up properly, but it happens, it was a very cold and damp day and it can happen.

Oh, how I missed the banter, how I missed the laughing. I was talking to my mum and she reckons since I turned 31, I've become a rebel, having never broken anything and in the space of 6 months doing my ankle in and potentially cracking a rib too. Its good to be back.

Ribcage!

Sunday was a fun day .. well actually, no it wasnt. After being woken by my mobile (cell phone to the yanks) at 09:20 and being asked to collect rainjackets for the kids at 10:45 ready for the afternoon, actually getting soaked while collecting the rainjackets and being told "shame none of them fit you, oh, dont you look wet". I got home, managed to get a shower (of all things) and then dry, myself and head coach Pete headed over to Coventry, having our usual team line up discussion in the car, we get to this nice little pokey village where its starting to slowly rain.

Under one tree was the "home" players, under another a group of "away" parents and under a safe umbrella, 16 kids huddling to keep warm - in the distance, a pylon and a railway track. Needless to say, 2 minutes later, thunder and lightening kicks off and no one really knows where to move too - I took the option and stood in the middle of the pitch. I was in a real twat of a mood and decided to only give those kids who didnt have a jacket, a rain jacket - with every intention of giving the rest out after the game. The rain got heavier so got our lads out training, trying to get that pyschological edge over the "home" team who were cowering and praying to someone that they wouldnt end up in Coventry's worse electrical storm. To conclude, the game got called off, I got soaked for a 2nd time.

With not running around like a headless chicken telling 10 year olds to "wake up", "get a grip" and "sort your sham out" I decided to play 5aside football with Captain Pete - it was about time I got some football playing into me - so on the 3rd attempt, I got drenched to the skin, and to make matters even worse - got a swift elbow to the ribs by an opposition player, and felt my rib go inwards. Very strange feeling and completely knocked me for 6 - not only in the mind, but also in speed. We ended up loosing 12-9 or something, but still managed to get a goal - scrappy though it was - decided if ribs are better by Wednesday, I'll play my old stomping ground of 6pm KO as the kids now train on Friday - huzzar!

Welcome to the nut house

As weeks go, the last couple of weeks have been that crazy rollercoaster that you dream about now and again. I ended up meeting up with someone I managed to get a number for a couple of fridays, had a couple of beers, and more beers, then some wine, then some spirits. Of all things I ended up in the local cheesy nightclub (Rios) and accompanied by more alcomohol - next thing I know, I'm getting kissed and told that she quite likes me and would like to go out some other time if I fancied. Well, you know, I'm one of these new men and welcome opportunities such as that and nodded and agreed as she shoved her tongue into my mouth (nice image I know). I have to say, I was a bit suspicious, but thats the kind of person I am - why would anyone like me - I'm just me ... you know

Anyhoo, 4 days later, I was in bed, having a special steve sleep - well trying too - and while hugging onto my special teddybear, my phone went off (time 23:34) to someone in tears asking why I havent been in touch and why I havent asked them out on a date, then a hung up tone. I smile, and rollover and fall asleep. 2 minutes later, the phone goes, and the same thing, at this point, insert the same routine 3 times, til the next time, I get a threat that they're going to "cut" themselves. Now, I'm not a trained specialist in the art of attention seeking, "cutting" or people who need that "special" help, but you obviously do the best you can to calm them down, and convince them, a) I'm really not worth it b) maybe they need some help and c) who would actually clean up the mess. Harsh I know, but my Cubs badge didnt really cover this kind of training, and I really needed sleep. So after 30 minutes of calming someone down, the phone goes dead again - then, as you know that at 18:00 the BBC 6 O'Clock news is about to start, the phone rings again, still to tears. I told her how it was and that she should go to bed, without any blades and everyones happy.

Needless to say - THIS FUCKING SCARED THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS OUT OF ME!!!!

I was busy the following week, so didnt have a chance to spend time on my own, nevermind entertain, so recieved a text from her and a phone call, with promises that it was a one off - so, like small shrew, I saw the best in somsone again. However this time, questions of where it was "all going" arose, small panic attacks, fist clenching and dragging nails into her own arms - I was ready to tell "Steve's Whitelie" of "Oh, I have to go meet my mate Rich down the pub, he's not very well you know". All of a sudden, her fist connected with my face - needless to say, after counting to 5, I politely asked her to leave, 18 pounds later of Chinese takeaway, I was still receiving text messages of "I've messed up, havent i?"

I know this is a little long, but my point is, where do you go from here - this seriously funks your head up and confidence with women and now can only think I attract a) crazies, b) people who deny they are crazy, but actually are and c) I really cant efford to spend 18 quids worth of chinese takeaway, everytime it happens.

From now ... crazy free town please!

Day off #1

The last time I had a day off, was the Bali trip, since then, I've returned to work and not stopped, so a couple of days off to chill, relax and continue improving the flat isnt too much to ask, is it ? You would think not, however waking up around 10.30 to monsoon style rain over the canal, I decided to turn over and fall back asleep.

After deciding that I needed to do something with the day, I replied to a couple of football related emails, made myself a cup of tea and decided to get ready for a trip to Ikea. Normally a 35/40 minute trip on a good day, why not ?! Well, I knew it was going to be a bad day, when the shower wouldnt run hot, so checking the boiler and 20 minutes later, getting the water temperature I desired.

20 minutes into the car journey up the M6 - I was stuck in tailbacks of around 10 mile, knowing Newcastle United were kicking off around 15:55, I wanted to get back with enough time to get at least a couple of beers inside me. I reached my destination after 2 hours, scooted around Ikea, and returned (via a diversion) at 18:05 - finding out NUFC had win 1-0. In that process, spending around 100 quid on nice funky things for the flat, when in reality, I went for a pair of curtains I could dye! Needless to say, I also managed to pick up norwegian style chocolate, pastry and alcohol - alls not lost then!

Different levels of desperation!

OK, I admit it, mainly before someone else spots it and takes the piss, I joined a dating website. Most of it was because I wanted to see who was out there on the market, and another part of me is fed up with being labelled as tapping people who, then going away feeling guilty about it. Why shouldnt I be "tapping" people up, I'm youngish, I'm alright looking, I'm single, and dont want to spend the rest of my life regretting things.

So, I've done it, I'm not convinced I'll do anything about it, nor am I convinced I'll spend money so I can "talk" to other people looking. But again, thats how I've always been, wait for other people to make the move.

Annoying this is, you can do a search by postcode, ie, who's single and local, and I dont know where the hell these people drink and/or socialise - if I did, I dont think I would be single. However, thats also assuming that they would be interested in such a shambles like myself.

U11 Colts - Match Day #1

You may or may not be aware that I've taken up the management of Leamington Brakes U11 Colts. This is the first season that I've done any type of football management, and also the first time the lads have played 11aside. An interesting combination.

The Colts were the only team playing away from home today against Coundon Cockerels with a 1.30 kick off. This is the first season that the U11 Colts have played 11 aside, and indeed the first time myself, Pete and JJ have been involved in training and coaching kids.

Following the destruction of the one and only friendly that the colts were involved with (9-1 against emscott colts) we played a 5-3-2 formation, with Dan Dyson, David Fairbairn and Matthew Robertson in the centre of defence. Left and Right back were the twins (Gabriel and Isaac Saxton-Knight). Running midfield were Rory Barber (Cpt), Harry Gane and Aidan Bradbury, while Charlie Smith and Wilf Dove played up front and supported by the midfield. Richard "the stopper" Cure was ever present between the sticks.

Playing for the first time on a full sized pitch didnt phase the lads as the back 5 kept strong throughout the first half, with the Brakes going into the first half with a commanding effort with around 3 close chances and the opposition hardly getting a sniff on target. Making subs in the 2nd half (including Julian Loscombe, Nilun Dubay, Zack Wilkins and Thomas Henderson) the Brakes were playing into the sun, however after a number of counter attacks, the lads broke through the Cockerels defence, and Bradbury taking in a strong shot on target and the keeping making a hash of it.

The remaining of the game was 50-50 with it looking like the Brakes were about to get a good away 3 points. However, disaster struck with 2 minutes left and the Cockerels itching through our defence and putting it inches wide of Richard who had a blinding game. Refreshing to see a referee (who was their assistant) having a good game - and being awarded full marks by Leamington Brakes FC.

Final Score :-
Coundon Cockerels 1 - Brakes U11 (Colts) 1 (0-0 HT)

MOM :-
Rory Barber

Summary :-
60 minutes of 120% commitment from the lads and more importantly, playing as a Team.

Man Stroking Cock

Man stroking his cock :- does what it says on the tin

The Magic Number?

Not happy with getting tickets for the Kooks this year, I found that the Magic Numbers were also touring the UK - and playing in Brum at the end of Nov. After doing a quick round of who's in and who's out, I ordered 4 tickets for myself, Andy, Nomes and the lyrical shamster, Bellis. This is something I've been looking forward too for a while, and a band that I certainly watch out for new tracks on itunes and on t'internet. Hopefully they'll play some new material on the tour, and give us the chance to purchase some fantastic stylish tshirts.

4 - the magic number?

Wot No Posting - Update I

After returning from Bali, I had a long weekend up in Newcastle, mainly to see the folks and sister, after all I hadnt been up since breaking my ankle all those months ago. Another reason was Abigail's Christening (Een and Sarah's new baby) back in my home down of Winlaton, and I'd arranged to take Philippa, as she cant drive yet - dur.

Normally when I go up, its all stressful and pressured, I think mainly because I dont go up that often, then I spend the whole time running around, trying to keep everyone happy, but not this time - it was pretty relaxed. I think it was due to still being in Holiday mode, but hey, it was still 5 oC cooler than in Leamington. One thing that didnt change, was my mum harping on about how me and Philippa are perfect for each other and oh, "blah blah blah".

I picked up Philippa as arranged and she looked stunning, she normally does, but this was drop dead stunning. The christening was nice, as far as churches go, and Abigail didnt cry at the ceremony, which is always nice. I bumped into Harry (Een's dad) at the party afterwards, where he harped on about me and Pippa getting it together, then Pippa decided to rate ties in order of niceness, mine coming bottom. I came to the conclusion, doesnt matter what it was, regardless if she does like me like that, I'd always rank bottom - but such as life you know.

We'd arrange to go watch Newcastle play Villareal that afternoon, then go for some beers and relax, however, when we got back to Pip's place, ordered a Pizza, she decided to go for a Powernap and I had to wake her when the football was about to start on channel5. We had a couple of beers, and decided that maybe we should just stay in and watch a movie instead - which we done.

A good long weekend, might actually go back up vr shortly.

Keep on running :: Nike +

I purhcased a ipod nano before I went away on vacation in Bali, and a couple of days later, Apple and Nike released a joint partnership called Nike+. Effectively, its a small device that slides into the base of the ipod nano, the same slot that you dock with your PC, which communicates wirelessly to a small device which slips into the bottom of your Nike+ trainer. The device itself is pretty cheap, at 15 quid, however the expense comes when you have to buy the trainers, which to be fair, I've been after a new pair for a while, so its a small excuse, isnt it ?

I also purchase a Nike+ top, which has an embedded little pocket on the arm that houses your ipod nano, and also includes cable holes, so you're not running around and also strangling yourself at the time.

To calibrate the device, I popped my trainers on and wandered into town a couple of weeks ago, managing about 400metres, however today, managed around 2.18 miles. How do I know this ? Well, when you dock your ipod into the PC, it automatically updates the runs up to T'interweb via iTunes, giving you graphical view of when you slowed down, when you speeded up and updates every mile (or Km if you're metric).

Nike+ :: faster than me, obviously.

The Nike+ application also allows you to setup goals, mine is to run 10 miles in 8 weeks (of which I've done 2.1 miles so far) and it also allows you to challenge other Nike+ users within the same area or same age or same sex.

The Leaderboard function gives you a list of people (per week, per month, or ever) which allows you to drill down per sex, per geo, per age. Currently, out of everyone, I'm 10125th, and in the UK, 786th, and finally, in the UK, between the age of 30 and 39 and male, I'm 268th - impressive.

Cor Blimey Guvnor

Strange that my life gets, lastnight just tipped it off nicely with a cherry. I got invited to play 5aside football with a couple of friends, and after 3 months out of injury and being away on vacation for 2.bit weeks - I thought perhaps it was a good idea to get fit once again. After arriving at the pitch, someone nudged me and said that no other than Ian Beale from Eastenders would be turning up. Of course, I laughed, then sure enough, he turned up, warmed up and was on the opposite team to me!

"Alright me ol' china!?" - Ian Beale, yesterday

Obviously being star struck, I managed to sandwich him between myself and one of his players on my first touch ... it felt good to be back. Adam Woodyatt, who plays Ian, managed to score a couple and put his team well in front, however up to the whistle, we managed to get a couple goals back to make it something like 5-3.

Not making excuses, because I thought I done alright lastnight, and the fact it was hot, and we played for 90 minutes, rather than the 60, I managed to come away without breaking anything - although I think my little finger is out of joint thanks to our celeb friend when I was in goal.

Duff Man - oh yeah!

Well, I'm back from Bali, and within 90 minutes of returning to British soil, I discovered that Newcastle United had signed Damian Duff from Chelsea for 5 million quid. Fantastic news. Hopefully getting to the Villareal game next week with Miss Pippa to check him out and any new signings if we're lucky.

Things that go wrong for me #23

Multimedia message
Originally uploaded by docwharton.

Bad Karma!

Good! Not winking now, oh Boo Hoo Hoo! *

"I miss my best friend Wayne!" - A Cry baby (yesterday) - centre

Fake Tiltshift

I was reading FNM a while back and noticed some guy had taken a number of photographs, and manipulated it so much that it looked they were minature models. With joining flickr, you get to see different types of photography and of course it inspires you to get involved, try different things and learn something new. I had a chat to John about it and he give me a couple of FAQ websites on how to do it, and was even so kind to provide a suggested item of free software that can recreate the perception.

I've never classed myself as an arty type person, I leave this up to the likes of John, Rich and of course, World respected Andy Palin. So I was quite suprised how good it appeared once you understood what the application was trying to do, what to highlight and what to bring into focus.

Bruge - not really that small

The original photo from the above was taken 4 years ago in Bruge, knowing what the buildings looked like anyhow, it was quite nice applying this technique to the photograph and make it appear to be a mininature town.

Ice formations around a fountain.

Not happy with just taking buildings and streets, I've attempted to apply it to objects too with strange but effective results.

The rest of my fake tiltshift online folder can be seen at :-

http://www.flickr.com/photos/docwharton/sets/72157594178594772/

Gaffer - to you!

The meeting I had up at the football club was all a little hush hush, not many people knew what was going on, and even I only knew the basics. I got up there in decent time, said hello to the people I already knew, got introduced to those who I didnt. Thats what I like about the club, its all very friendly, all very family so if you dont know who you're dealing with, someone will introduce you anyhow.

Anyhow, the reason I was there, was they were discussing the junior squad that they were putting out this season, turns out that after speaking to a couple of people about getting involved, that they were looking for a manager and a number of coaches. I've always wanted to do football managent, even got to the level where I was looking at how to do coaching badges. Anyways, I'd been asked if I wanted to get involved in football management with an Under 11's squad, and the talk I had with the Junior board was very positive, appears everyone is in the right direction - and they sold it to me.

We had a little handover from the guy who was currently covering the kids, as he was moving on to a new position, so got a couple of names and ideas, and got asked to attend a training session on Wednesday evening. All very sudden, but all very exciting - so much so I'm pondering creating a new blog for my experience - what do you reckon ?

Driving me to .. er drive!

I've got a meeting at the football club tomorrow, and with the ankle healing up quite nicely, I thought its good time to give that old driving malarky a quick whizz, mainly because the car has been sat in the same place for the last 8 weeks.

I wanted to make sure that the car could actually move, just incase the battery had given up on keeping the slidy doors locked - but hey, it worked well, I had a drive around the block and managed to park it nicely outside my place overnight. Today driving, tomorrow the world!

Driving me to shop!

Today has been planned for a while, shopping in Brum for the holiday - including clothes, technology and accessories. FHM were running a promotion where if you take a voucher you get 20% off - which isnt to shabby really - only thing is it ruined a nice photo Nikki Sanderson on the other side.

After lastnight we were a little knackered and hungover, but we stuck with it - including the heat and we managed to get into the city at a decent time, and started with Selfridges straight away, going out seperate ways, armed with our phones incase we got lost or bored. I headed straight to Ted Baker - spent a fortune in about 5 minutes, while in the same time frame - Debbie spent a small fraction.

I picked up an ipod nano to take away, its so small, you just think its going to break, but its actually fantastic. I didnt want to take my big 40Gb ipod away with me - incase it gets smashed - mainly because it has all my photos and ALL my music, some of which isnt stored anywhere else. Thats my reasoning anyhow, and I'm sticking to it - it does look smart tho.

After approx 5 hours, we got the O'Neills surf shop where we placed the voucher on the desk and the nice Oz guy was helpful to both of us - giving us hints and tips in Bali. As we spent over a certain amount, I also recieved a free surfing lesson which is worth around 80 quid - and 2 1/2 hours in total - just in cornwall. Its valid til december - so you never know - might be a laugh for a long weekend away.

All in all, an exhausting day, but enjoyable. Given a couple more hours, think I could have spent SO much more - so probably wise that we headed home.